Barriers

Image Description: A close-up photograph showing a person’s arm and hand extended towards the camera, with soft blue and pink lighting

This is a photo of me in makeup reaching out towards a mirror. This character desires connection but there is a barrier. So no matter how hard they try to reach out they can’t embrace the other person through the glass. They want to hold them but there is nothing they can do to make it happen. This photo shows how isolating it can be when the world revolves around sex. It governs so much of our lives whether we like it or not. But I don’t really have a connect to that world. There is just a fear that in the end I’m going to be left alone in the end. Even if I make friends that I love and love me too there’s still a chance they can start dating and fall in love and have kids, and create this whole life where I’m not in it. So sometimes I wish I can do that too in the same way they can. So I don’t have to be alone when they are all gone. I can even see my friends hoping I can connect to someone the same way they do so I’m not alone in the end. But I want to let you know that it isn’t that I’m not proud of my asexuality and aromanticism and don’t accept that part of myself. It’s just a fear that I have from living in a world that values a form of intimacy that I can’t connect to.